


A Man and His Traditions

by Holy_Leonards



Category: Fallout 4
Genre: Anal Sex, Cold Wasteland Nights, Crack, M/M, Marriage, corpse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-01
Updated: 2016-05-01
Packaged: 2018-06-05 15:46:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6711298
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Holy_Leonards/pseuds/Holy_Leonards
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nick and Nate get married and a special guest drops in.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Man and His Traditions

It was a joyous day throughout the Commonwealth. A couple was getting married! Not just any couple, mind you, but the one and only Nick and Nate. N&N. Night Nips. The two N's. Double trouble from before the war. Whatever you like to call them, they were tying the knot. It was not an easy decision for either N since they both had lost their wives, but they felt that this was the logical step forward. 

It took place in the middle of Diamond City. They disassembled Takahashi so that he would not be a problem. They also converted his noodle stand into a little gazebo so that they could have a romantic smooch without getting sunburns. 

Everyone from all over the Commonwealth had shown up. But the real surprise was the special guest. But that will be revealed later. For now, we have a wedding to see!

This was not your typical wedding. Neither of them cared about if they saw each other before or not or if they even dressed up. They did decide that they would both dress in patchy detective clothes since Nick was apparently unable to get out of them (not sure how true that will prove to be, if you know what I mean ;) ). They just walked up to the noodle gazebo and shared a smooch. Then they put the ring on each other's finger and walked back to Nick's office. 

But wait! The special guest! Fear not, they decided to stop by the office to check in on them after the clean up from the wedding had ended.

–---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Fuck! Fuck me Nick!”

Nick was really giving it to Nate in the ass. He was using the large caliber attachment today. It was a special day, of course. It was slipping in and out of the almost overstretched hole that belonged to the hero of the Commonwealth. The very man who had blown up the institute and saved everyone from the shadowy menace. Right now, he was enjoying the fruits of their labor. 

“Woah there, Nate, I gotta lube up some more. Now, where did I put that...”

Nick started to walk away while still inside Nate. But, his dick was in there so deep that he took Nate with him on his dick while he went into the other room.

“Ugh ahhh mmmm uhhhh Nick!”

“Oh! Sorry!”

Nick pushed him off of his dick and then made his way to the other room to find that pesky bottle of lube. 

Nate walked back into the main room and there was a knock at the door. He quickly put on his version of the detective coat and answered the door.

“NICK! COME QUICK! SOMEONE IS HERE TO SEE US!”

Nick grabbed his spare coat and came running down, monster dong still attached.

“Rod!”

At the door was Rod Serling. Well, more like his dead body. Rod would never miss their big day, no matter how many centuries he had been dead for. The lifeless body slithered inside and sat in a pile at the corner of the room.

“How has the world been treating ya, Rod?”

The body continued to stay limp and lifeless.

“Good, good. How are your kids doing.”

No response.

“Good for them!”

Then Nick realized that his donger was still in work mode.

“Uh, Nate, can I see you in the back?”

“Sure.”

They went to the other room and Nick started unscrewing his attachment. They spoke in whispers so that Rod Serling's corpse did not hear them.

“What are we gonna do with him? He sounds like he wants us dead!”

“He might, Nate, he just might.”

“What did we do?”

“We didn't smoke the ceremonial Marlboros before we kissed.”

“The what?”

“Can't you smell it on him? He requires that every wedding he goes to that the couple smokes a Marlboro cigarette before kissing.”

“Dammit!”

“Nate, honey, I have a plan.”

“Shoot.”

“I have this can of air freshener here. On the count of three, you go kick him as hard and as fast as you can, and I will spray him with it. Then we book it out of here. Sound good?”

“Let's do this.”

“One...two...three! Chaaaarge!”

They ran in. Nate started curb stomping the under-nourished version of Alfred Hitchcock while Nick sprayed the entire can of air freshener all over the guy's body. He instantly turned to smoke and filled he room.

“Gas! Run!”

They ran out, coats blowing in the breeze and revealing their junk. They ran and ran as the whole city laughed at them. Soon they found that they were in the middle of nowhere with no food, water, or clothing. The cold wasteland night soon came and claimed them. They learned that day to never mess with a man and his traditions.


End file.
